For the last couple of years, I have had dreams that my husband no longer loves me and leaves me for another woman. These dreams leave me feeling emotionally distressed upon waking and oftern cause tension between my husband and myself if I tell him about them.

What I can’t understand is that we have a very happy and strong marriage. We completely trust each other and know that the other wouldn’t do anything to jeopardize our relationship with one another. Why would I be having this dream?

-Vivian, Age 25, St. Louis, MO, USA

Hi Vivian -

You write that your relationship with your husband is strong and happy and that you have a high level of trust with each other. In this type of scenario, your occasional dreams appear to be simple “fear” dreams - you are afraid of losing that good relationship.

Everyone who is in a relationship or marriage experiences occasional periods of insecurity. Your husband’s irritation at your dreams most likely reflects his assumption that you are implicitly accusing him of cheating or of wandering attention - neither of which, from your report, appears to be the case. In the future you may want to remind yourself that these types of dreams actually reflect more upon your own state of emotions than they do upon his. If you wake up feeling a little insecure, ask your husband for some reasssurance. I’m sure he will give you some. The words “I love you very, very, very, much” - can really start your day on the right foot!