OK. I was best friends with this girl for 4 years. Then about a year ago, we started to drift. And now we don’t even talk at all. I have tried to send her e-mails, and she never responds. I know that she is getting them because it shows that she checked her mail.

So I have been having recurring dreams. Not the same exact dream, just the same situation. In the dream, I always try to go up to her and talk to her, but she always is mean to me and refuses to talk. I always wake up so frusterated and drained. I have been having these dreams for about 7 months now. How do I get rid of them?

—Jennifer, Age 17, California, USA

Hi Jennifer—

It sounds like you’re getting double-dissed! You can’t get any respect from this girl in real life, and you can’t get any respect in your dreams either!

Actually, your dreams are just showing you how frustrating it is to try to keep up your friendship with this girl. You two used to be best friends, but lately it’s been anything but.

You know she’s receiving your emails, but she still doesn’t respond. What’s up with that? This is why your dreams show you trying to say hello to her, and also why they show her not talking to you, or saying something mean. (Sometimes “no response” (to your emails) —can say a lot!)

What’s the message of this dream? It’s time to let go of your old best friend, at least until she’s ready to be friends again, and treat you with the respect your deserve. It’s hard to leave old friends behind, but sometimes—it’s the only language they understand!