I’m 14 and I a dream about me and the guy I like. I had this dream that I was pregnant with his kid. When I told him I thought I was pregnant he drove me to the doctor and he stuck with me through the whole thing. Then, I suddenly had the baby and we were both taking care of him. I would get off of the bus with him and the baby and we were the perfect little family. We were going to get married as soon as we were old enough. I tried to hide everything from everyone as long as possible because I knew I would get in trouble. Me and the guy stayed together though. I think I had this dream because I like the guy so much and I want to be with him, so I figured if we had a kid we would have to have a relationship. I’m not positive what it means, so I was wondering if you could tell me.

- Megan, Age 14, Milford, NJ, USA

Hi Megan -

Your heart is in the right place, but I’m not sure your strategy is very good!

I hope your dream of getting pregnant so that you and your boyfriend would “have to have a relationship” is just an idle thought - and not an act you are seriously considering. It’s clear that you like this guy, and that you feel confident in his commitment to you. In the dream, he “stood by you” throughout your pregnancy and raising the child. But having fantasies of parenthood is very different from the day-to-day reality and responsibility. Also, if you do some research on teen-age mothers, you will find that most of them wind up raising their babies alone. The stress and demands of raising a child are often too much for a young couple to bear - so they split up.

Remember that relationships are partnerships. If you want to be a good partner to your boyfriend - you actually want to be very careful to avoid “early” and unplanned pregnancies. Having children will be one of the most rewarding experiences of your life. Don’t mess it up by having a baby before you - and your partner - are ready.