I have recurring dreams recently. In one I am fishing, in a stream or lake. Sometimes I catch really big fish. I cannot remember much else about the dream.

The other recurring dream is about being chased by a large black bear. So far it has not caught and attacked me, but I wake up really frightened and panicked.

I don’t know whether it has anything to do with the fact that lately I’ve been stressed, trying to decide to accept a marriage proposal from my mate, and toying with the idea of having an affair with a co-worker that I’m so attracted to. I’ve avoided it so far because he’s married and I don’t want to interfere.

I’m female, 42, divorced for 7 years.

—Anonymous, Age 42, Divorced, Harrisburg, PA, USA

Hi Anonymous—

It’s rough out there in the wilderness of love!

Is it possible that recurring dream #1 (Gone Fishing!) has anything to do with a woman who’s “throwing out her line” to see if there are still any “good catches” out there? We know from your dream report that there’s at least one tasty morsel you’d like to get in your net!

Continuing our fishing metaphor, is it too surprising that a big black bear appears in this picture? His meaning is danger. And in your case, this danger could come from any direction!

Affairs are risky business all the way around. Indeed—you jeapordize losing all those nice options that currently you enjoy keeping on your “hook.” You might lose your mate, you might lose your fun flirting with your co-worker, and you might lose your self-respect, for interfering in another couple’s marriage.

The solution? Recognize compromise in your life, choose your “catch” carefully, and once you’ve “made your bed”—lay in it!