My fiance has recently had a couple of dreams that have disturbed us.

First she dreams of finding a dead butterfly - the most beautiful butterfly she’s ever seen - but it’s dead.

Second she dreams about working Friday, Saturday and Sunday nights as a chef in a busy restaraunt (she is, by her own admission, no cook).

I know the details are sketchy - but these dreams have her worried - any thoughts would be welcome.

--Anonymous, Age 45, UK

Hi Anonymous -

I think your fiance may be nervous about getting married. Women have their own version of cold feet - you know!

In the first dream I think the butterfly may represent your fiance. It is the most beautiful butterfly, but it also has died. This may be a dream metaphor for the passing of her youth and innocence, as she prepares to enter for good the realm of grown ups and responsibility. The transition from singledom to marriage always is harrowing - and fraught with fear about what we give up as we enter our new roles.

In the second dream, your fiance seems to be worried about doing many years worth of cooking, or it’s equivalent - housework, chores, etc! In light of this, and I’m really serious, I think you need to be mindful of helping her out in the kitchen and in other household duties. Let her know that it’s a group effort.

It’s a new time! We have to share all the jobs around the house! Also, to be on the safe side - be sure you eat out once a week or so! :-)

I would encourage your fiance to talk about her feelings with you. It’s important to learn her concerns, and for her to learn yours. I think you’ll find you share many in common.

Best of luck!