I am a 38-year-old woman, and my very best friend whom I have known and been close to since I was in the sixth grade lives a state away from me. We don't communicate as much as we once did -- our lives are so totally opposite. I am married, have six children and a granddaughter, and she is divorced and has never had any children. But still we feel very close to each other and have made trips to visit each other when we can. My mother used to let me take the Greyhound bus out to see her at least once a year when I was a teen. But over the last several years, I have not been able to do this near as much.

I have had several dreams in which I go to visit her. The dreams are all different, but in one way they are all the same. The common factor is that once I get there, I always have a very hard time making it back home to my husband and children -- sort of like I am stuck there. In these dreams, I am always feeling frantic about getting back home. It almost makes me nervous to really try to plan a visit to see her.

Please help me to figure out what this means. Her mother just passed away within the last four months, and I feel guilty that I haven't gone to see her, but my dreams have bothered me enough that I haven't tried as hard as I should to make it out there.

Scared to be stranded,

—Vel, age 38, Utah, USA

Hi Vel—

I think your signature holds the clue we need to understand your dreams. For whatever reason, it is apparent that you have begun to associate your old friend, who is divorced and never had children, with fears of losing your own family. This is why your dream shows you becoming "stuck" in her town -- away from your husband and children.

It is true that your lives have proceeded in different directions since those long summer rides on a Greyhound bus to visit each other as teenagers. Today, your family life is blessed with abundance; at the young age of 38, you already are a grandmother. Your friend's family life, after a failed marriage, has remained absent.

If your friend was negative toward your husband or family, I would understand your desire to distance yourself from her. If she hasn't given you any reason to feel threatened, though, I would encourage you to re-examine these fears. Instead of worrying that your dream may be precognitive, that you might really become "stuck" were you to visit her, perhaps a simpler explanation is in order. Is it unsettling to imagine yourself in your friend's position?

The holiday season is upon us. It is a time for sharing and generosity with those less fortunate, and for extending our families to friends and neighbors. In the spirit of the holidays, have you considered inviting your old friend to visit? I'm sure she would love the opportunity to catch up, to pitch in with the cooking, and to create new memories.

What's the message of this dream? It's time to put aside your fears, pick up your phone, and open your door to an old friend.