I’ve had two dreams recently that have left me puzzled. In the first I was in bed having light sex with one of my favorite singers. In the second I met my all-time favorite recording artist and we started talking as if we had known each other for years. In the dream we got into my new luxury car (I don’t own a luxury car in real life) and he drove me all around town to his favorite spots. We laughed and talked, listened to music, and then he brought me back. He got out, gave me a hug and kiss, and then I drove off.

I would like to know what these dreams are trying to tell me. I’m 43 years old, have never married, have always worked 2 jobs, and recently went through therapy for relationship addiction. All my life I have been in and out of bad relationships with men.

I am currently continuing therapy on my own, because my counselor told me that I’ve come a long way in a short time (3 months). I’m a book-worm for self-help books on addictions, relationships, and boundaries. I also have a good male friend at my second job. We get along well and he shows me affection in little ways that I have never gotten before—without me giving something first (sex, dinners, money, etc.). I would like to someday get married, but I don’t dwell on it as much as I used to. Now I’m just working on myself and finding ways to strengthen my faith. I also just started a new temp-to-perm job, as I was recently laid off from my last day job.

—Deborah, Age 43, Single, USA

Hi Deborah—

New cars, rock stars, and romance! We know you’re enjoying your nightlife, but why—you want to know—have these high-flying celebrities come to visit in your dreams? Are the dreams a sign that you are about to become romantically involved with a famous person? Or is there another, more symbolic meaning to your dreams?

The true star of celebrity dreams actually is ourselves—rather than the celebs we dream about. The reason why is because celebs, in dreams and in waking life, enjoy a high social status. Accordingly, if a superstar accepts us as a friend in a dream, or is romantically interested in us, it means that we are feeling good about ourselves. We believe that a celebrity would find us romantically attractive, and would want to spend time with us. Paradoxically, both of your celebrity dreams are strong votes of confidence in yourself.

Because you have been working with a therapist recently, you have learned that we perform compulsive behaviors (sex, drugs, relationships) because we want to escape difficult feelings and emotions in our lives. Your dreams show, however, that learning to finally address these difficult feelings (rather then hide from them) actually has come as a relief. Because of your intesive therapy, you are beginning to feel better about yourself. Your dreams of being attractive to superstars are proof!

The symbolism of the luxurious new car is yet another sign of “the new you.” Cars in dreams symbolize the self, and the “direction we are headed” in our lives. Because your car is a is a luxury car (high status), and because it is new (the new you), we know that you are feeling “back behind the steering wheel” of your life. Your therapy has given you a renewed sense of self, and increased your ability to achieve your goals.

What’s the meaning? It’s time to give yourself a pat on the back, for all the hard work you recently have performed. Your self-esteem is rising, and the future is an open highway. Congratulations on your deserved success!